saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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