I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
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