hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
