how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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