In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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