I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
