No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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