Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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