zippers are such a cool invention
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
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