yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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