i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
