Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Say something about gay babies.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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