I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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