This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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