This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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