Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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