I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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