If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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