Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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