She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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