Whatcha textin bout Willis?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize