see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
