i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
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I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
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You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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