You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Randomize