THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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