I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
