did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
