You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Your cock deserves a montage
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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