so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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