Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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