in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize
