is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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