We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
