she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
