I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
