Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
