when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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