1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize