I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
