spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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