I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I still have a little drunk in my system
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize