Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
