I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize