singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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