I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
