Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize