bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The best revenge is premature balding
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize