Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
