somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
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You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
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these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
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