did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I forget how to act sober
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
