do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
