Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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